For all intents and purposes, life was good for Karen: happily married and settled with three children and a nice life. A series of events -- including bereavement; a large, organised fraud involving threats, police involvement and a court case; and the sudden severe ill health of her husband -- sent her down a deep hole. Major depression and anxiety opened boxes that were closed many years ago containing trauma that was never disclosed and everything collapsed. PTSD added to the deep despair and there were numerous episodes of self-harm and suicide attempts. Six years of repeated admissions (mostly involuntary) followed, being treated with medications and four courses of ECT. ECT was instrumental in Karen being well enough to be able to engage with the therapy she needed for long-term recovery. The story is narrated with original diary extracts and poems written at the time of her suffering. Karen now works with the ECT Accreditation scheme, reviewing ECT clinics around the country, and has spoken extensively about her experiences to journalists and at conferences, trying to reduce the stigma that surrounds the treatment. She is also employed in the clinic where she received treatment as a peer support worker